every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
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