puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Randomize