She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize