The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
