what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
the condom got lost in my hair
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
