I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
This toilet bowl is my home.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
