Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize