I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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