their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
