I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
