oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
