adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
