I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
