I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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