He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
