I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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