so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
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And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
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I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
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