The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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