Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
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My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
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Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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