CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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