it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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