I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
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