Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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