is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
This is classic penis vs brain.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
