See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
