If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i dont even know how to be here
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize
