just come out here and I will go home with you...
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize