I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
COCAINE IS GR8
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
