Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
