thus making me awesome and them whores
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
