I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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