so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I'm always down for nudity.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
