Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
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