Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
