I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
