My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Randomize
