Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
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