Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
