my mouth tastes like poor choices
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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