got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
