I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
