Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
