I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
