i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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