the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
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