He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Me too!
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
