I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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