I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Randomize
