Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
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