I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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