Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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