Can i not drive my cunt home
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
third nipple confirmed
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize